Sunday, December 6, 2009

Previews and Reviews with Gore Jones

What up world!
Damn was this a big week not only in comics but in t.v too. Did anyone see Steven Seagal: Lawman or The Jersey Shore? Absolutely terrible but surprisingly funny none the less, bad television all around. Steven Seagal "supposedly" became a cop 20 years ago and suddenly decided that now was a good time to make a show about him and his comrades. Whackness. He talks about being a martial artist the whole time and then they have sequences of slow motion which is supposed to reflect his "ninja skills".
Jersey Shore is every bad thing about being an Italian / American in America today. Not only are they the stereotype "Guido's" but they're proud of that fact, that's like a hooker being proud and getting a tattoo that states she's a hooker.
If you've got nothing better to do and you feel like submitting an hour of your life you're never going to get back then check these shows out and laugh your ass off.

Now this weeks books were pretty big hence why again, I'm doing my reviews later in the week because there are some big things that happened that everyone needed to see and read for themselves so we can all "YES or NO!" together!

Let's talk about the Blackest Night books that came out this week;

Blackest Night Wonder Woman #1

In all honesty I think this should have come out last week. The story takes place in Washington, DC. Wonder Woman is following a trail of dead bodies to Arlington National Cemetery. None other than Max Lord is waiting for her after leaving behind all those dead bodies. Max was the one time liaison for the Justice League but eventually ended up being a villain and got his neck snapped by Wonder Woman. It's a good battle between Wonder Woman, the undead soldiers and Max Lord. She uses her lasso to create a bright enough light to destroy most if not all of the undead. The reason I said this should've come out last week is because in the "Blackest Night Timeline" at this point Wonder Woman is a Black Lantern. My only complaint is I wish that this dealt with the Amazons. We've got plenty of dead Amazons since the "Rise of the Olympians" story arc in Wonder Woman.

3 out of 5

Blackest Night Flash #1

Another book I feel should've come out last week. In this issue Barry Allen is running around in the background of the core "Blackest Night" book. He's going through all his memories of how he became the flash, how his mother died and how he dealt with Reverse-Flash. He thinks that The Reverse-Flash is going to come back since he snapped his neck. I'm a little lost, did this happen at the end of "Flash Rebirth" which is also written by Geoff Johns? The last issue for "Flash Rebirth" hasn't even come out yet so using that as a reference point is a bad idea. Needless to say the rest of the issue deals with The Rogues going to deal with their fellow reanimated rogues. Not bad but I just wish it had come out last week.

3 out of 5

Now let's talk about the new series that DC debuted this week;


Spinning out of the pages of JSA and The JSA 80 Page Giant comes this new book. Feeling like they're not really making a difference, Magog, Power Girl and the rest of the rookies branch off from the core team and create "The All Stars". Doing things differently after an almost botched battle with some bizarre new enemies, Magog beings to train the team in tactical battle. Creating different scenarios for the team to prepare for such as losing their abilities and being able to handle a fight as "normal people". This isn't much of a drastic change for the JSA but it's a step towards them becoming more of a paramilitary group as opposed to being just super heroes. Freddie Williams II's artwork pops off the pages, you're so drawn into his panels you almost forget to read what's going on. Matthew Sturges does a great job of giving this group of characters the team dynamic and their own individual personalities. This book is for everyone even if you've never read the JSA before. I totally recommend it.

5 out of 5

Now, over to Marvel to see what groundwork they've begun laying for 2010 and beyond.

First up is;

X-Force Annual #1

Having a new incarnation of X-Force, we're given a brand new annual. In the first story, Wolverine dives into a Hydra base in search of a father who's daughter is a mutant. She's in need of a bone marrow transplant and he's the only one who can do it. It's not a very good story and sadly it has no relevance to anything that's going on in any of the X-Books. It's written by Robert Kirkman of The Walking Dead fame but like I said it has nothing to do with anything. It's a self contained story that hopefully will have some relevance later on in a story line.
The second story is about Deadpool being on Utopia and having a grand ole' time shooting, stabbing and dismembering the re-animated former Acolytes of Magneto. It's a simple Deadpool story and as always it's laugh out loud. I really love when Deadpool calls Cyclops on his cell and asks him if he knows that Magneto is on the island and telling people that he's an X-Man. Overall this backup story saves this annual because even though it's funny and silly it has relevance to what's going on in the X-Books.

4 out of 5

Now, three books came out this week laying serious groundwork for their respective titles.

First up is;

Fall Of The Hulks Alpha.

First off I'd like to say "Thank You" to Jeff Parker. He does an amazing job of using villains who aren't exactly in the limelight as they once were. The combined forces of The Leader, Red Ghost, The Wizard, Egghead who is later replaced by M.O.D.O.K, The Mad Thinker and their silent partner in crime Dr. Doom form "The Intelligencia". This "team" of villain scientists comes together to gather intel from around the globe. Their common link is that with this intel, eventually it will serve each of their own purposes. The story is told through the eyes of The Leader, as it follows him and the team throughout their brief and unknown history. As the story progresses everything always leads back to The Hulk. The Leader is always haunted by him in some way or another. Eventually, Dr. Doom betrays the team once they gather all the information and libraries of knowledge they can get. The Leader goes underground. M.O.D.O.K shows up and the two men talk and figure out a way to bombard someone with Gamma radiation and Cosmic energy to create "The Red Hulk".
Finally, we're given a clue as to who and what the Red Hulk is.
If this is any indication as to how "The Fall Of The Hulks" is going to be then I guess it was worth the wait.

5 out of 5

Dark Avengers Annual #1

Not too long ago, No-varr aka Marvel Boy left the "Dark Avengers" because he became aware that they were in fact impostors, faking heroes that were really villains and criminals. Since then, he's been trying to built a communication device to get in touch with the Kree Supreme Intelligence. After a knock down, drag out fight with the Sentry, he finally makes contact with the Supreme Intelligence and is told that he now replaces Captain Marvel as the Kree's protector of Earth. He is given his own set of Quantum Bands that are created specifically for him. This part of the story was great. This was the whole point of the annual, to show what he's been doing since he left and to built past that point.
Bendis does a great job of filling in the blanks but then drops his pants and poops all over the story at the last two pages..
Why in God's name do we see STEVE ROGERS in civies and BUCKY dressed as Cap!?!?
Not only are they the last page but the two of them are talking about how this new Captain Marvel may be a valuable asset to their cause. Steve Rogers is dead still. Cap. Reborn hasn't finished yet, thanks for ruining an already ruined surprise. JERK!

4 out of 5

Siege: The Cabal

We all knew it was going to happen. Norman Osborn was bound to eventually crack. The first two pages show him talking to himself while holding the Green Goblin mask. The basic premise is Norman decides that Asgard isn't supposed to be on Earth and that the Asgardians are going to be more trouble than he can handle, so what does he do? Well he gets the Cabal together and demands that everyone help out Loki in removing the Asgardians from Earth. Taskmaster now takes the spots of Emma Frost and Namor since they're defection. Norman tells the group that they must help Loki. Dr. Doom arrives and refuses to help Norman with anything. He in fact tells Norman that "You are not a king nor a kingmaker". Osborn then unleashes his mystery "weapon" and it begins to kick the crap out of Dr. Doom. As always, Doom had sent a Doom Bot that releases killer techno bugs that kill everything. Luckily The Sentry shows up and saves Osborn from becoming lunch.
Osborn talks to the President and asks him if he can go into Asgard and invade it. The President tells Norman that they haven't done anything to merit any kind of strike let alone an invasion. Norman and Loki plot as to what must be done to make The President give him permission to invade Asgard. They come up with the idea of creating an "incident", along the lines of how the super hero Civil War began.

This book was awesome. If you missed out then get to the store and get on this. It's the beginning to the end for Norman Osborn.

5 out of freakin 5!

Some good, some bad but all in all a great week in comics. I'll see you kids at the store on Wednesday not just for comics but it's my 27th birthday and that's where I want to be.
Don't forget this Thursday night the "A NIGHT WITH SOCKO JONES TAILGATE"
It starts at 9pm and it's going to be so much fun your face is going to hurt from laughing.

Now what I'm JONESIN' for This week in comics:


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